oh this life. it drags, it whines.
i cannot control anything in it and i am angry. and sad. and tired.
i want to run away. i want a divorce. i want to be alone. i want to be selfish.
i want to crawl under the sheets and never come out. screw the toilet. screw food.
i read other blogs and the women are perfect – they do it all, don’t complain, don’t screw up.
i spent a whole day this week saying in my mind ‘Thank you Lord’, no matter what happened.
it didn’t work. i know… i know in my heart and in my mind. BUT the pressure is incredible.
the bills, the grad school papers, the hours at work, the laundry, the bills, the lack of time to read Scripture, the hours and hours and hours of doing.
i want to be out of here. off the planet. and no more stress. no more pressure. no more of people. people are the most frustrating of all.
and i am the worst of them.
December 3, 2011 at 6:13 am
I know the feeling, I’d like to think that I always say what’s in my mind but it is not true.There is always that feeling that I should have said something else. In my book it is okay to complain and not just go with tho flow. It is okay to express the we feel like crap sometimes and stop pretending that everything is okay all the time. I do not think that we have to explain why we are upset or mad; these are just feelings that we all experience and we have not need to explain or apologize for the way we are or the way we feel.