brokenBread……

life as it is seen from my heart and soul

friday ~ snow day

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Today was a snow day for north central Ohio.  so i went to work to get some stuff done.  it is amazing what you can get done without interruptions – no students, no phone calls, no ISD duty, no bosses walking in to ask something…. I got tons done.  Went through my files of lesson plans and tossed papers galore.  the recycle people won’t know what happened in my room.  got student files caught up.  needed to get some other things done, but they can wait.  checked on Moose.  (the class pet – a beta fish)  and I stayed longer than I meant to…. but it felt great.
so, came home…. got laundry started.  then went down to the pantry.  last weekend sam and I went to Menards… a rather large store (the large ones scare me, like the Ikea outside Cincinnati)…. but we got some sturdy shelving for my empty canning jars.  he put them together this week.  so I moved empty jars from the dark pantry to the light pantry.  and then I rearranged jars of food to make sure the oldest is up front and the newest is at the back of the shelves that sam built me last fall when I canned everything in sight.  I still have alot to move around, but I am making progress.
NOW…. the point of all this is…. i have been in a funk.  bitter.  angry.  I actually called an old friend this week asking her to call me because I believe she would understand my funk – I just wanted to talk, to ask some questions….. but I don’t believe she will be calling me back.  I guess I have been dropped out of one more person’s life ~ BUT THAT IS OK.  I am ok with it more so than what I thought I would be.  only because I think that I am getting taught in a way I never expected.  the God of the Universe, the Creator of a heart…. a brain…. a human being knows how to help me learn dependence in ONLY HIM.  not in a church, not in my job, not in stuff.. Him.
I like feeling neat and tidy and stocked up.  now don’t get me wrong ~ we have debt you wouldn’t believe  (sam lost a business) and we aren’t exactly the perfect married couple… and our 3 kids didn’t make the best choices (how else would they learn?) … and my mom is crazy…. and that is our life.  imperfect, grey, WOW.  despite all of this ~ I get to wake up every morning and breathe.  Christ lets me breathe.  I need to think on that for a while.

Author: melinda

a follower of Christ & a Daughter of the Great High King of Heaven disguised as a wife, a mum, a nurse, a baker, a gardener, a teacher, an artist and many things unknown by others.

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